


All for the Greater Good

by euphoria_edits



Category: Euphoria (TV 2019)
Genre: Angst and Romance, Canon but with a twist, Dirty Talk, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Humor, Lexi-centric, Pining, Rue is sober, Smut, confident rue, confused rue, cute lexii, drunk lexi, embarassed lexi, furious lexi, jealous lexi, lexi gay panic, lexi is just a complete mess, playful maddy, post college/uni, rue glows up
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-20
Updated: 2020-05-20
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:15:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,678
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24215011
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/euphoria_edits/pseuds/euphoria_edits
Summary: After surviving 4 years by herself at college, Lexi missed everyone so fucking bad.Especially Rue.The one she was so head over heels in love with, even though she knew Rue would never see her as anything more than her childhood best friend.So when she returned home, she couldn't wait to see her crush.But to say Lexi was not prepared for what was about to come was an understatement.She never in a million years imagined it would go down the way it did...
Relationships: Cassie Howard & Lexi Howard, Lexi Howard & Maddy Perez, Lexi Howard/Maddy Perez, Rue Bennett & Lexi Howard, Rue Bennett/Lexi Howard
Comments: 8
Kudos: 81





	All for the Greater Good

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guyss, so I didn't expect this flashback to be sooo long so I just decided to make it an entire chapter before moving onto the main chunk of the fic so don't worry guys, the fic technically hasn't even started yet😂 
> 
> And I hope I wasn't rambling too much cos half the time I don't even know if I'm making sense so pls bear with me😭
> 
> Just a side note, this is my very first time writing a fan fic so pls forgive me for any awfully stupid mistakes :(
> 
> Hope you enjoy, nonetheless :)

Lexi’s glad to be back home.

Even though it isn’t as fascinating and sophisticated as New York, just the fact that she’s not 3000 miles away from her loved ones removes the invisible safety net she created around her body for the last 4 years. 

Not that she felt physically endangered around the people in her college - except for her crazy roomie who couldn’t switch the gas off to save her fucking life let alone have any concern for her tiny dorm's life- Lexi has never been a people person so having to allow anyone into her life with her ever so restricted bubble of openness has been like letting Nate Jacobs babysit her kid if she ever had one (or even babysit Cassie for that matter). 

Okay maybe that was a slight exaggeration but point is, Lexi prefers to stick to the people she’s most comfortable with - Cassie, Maddy (when she’s not being a scary bitch), Kat, BB (who she’s only talked to like twice in her life but strangely enough finds her presence weirdly soothing) and OF COURSE Rue. 

Rue Bennett. 

The one she could never forget during the entirety of her college time. 

Just saying those three letters,

R - U - E 

does all sorts of flips and turns inside her body. 

Staying away from Rue for 4 years has probably been the toughest challenge Lexi has ever faced in her lifetime, arguably even more painful than her dad leaving her family- at least she no longer had to cry herself to sleep every night from overhearing both her parents screaming and smashing things with only a flimsy wall to soften the tumultuous clamor. 

The last time Lexi recalls seeing Rue in the flesh was a few days before leaving for college at Maddy’s “dope-fest for kickass bitches" party (by whom Maddy really means herself )- honestly, if Lexi could visualise how Maddy's brain functioned then she would give her life savings for it. 

Rue had been hanging with Jules and some other girl Lexi couldn’t quite remember the name of. 

Hannah, Jenna, Joanna? 

Rue really wasn’t good with names as Lexi could swear Rue gave her 5 different names for that mystery girl when she asked her who the Afro-haired charmer acting unusually cozy next to Jules was.

Well, it was pretty obvious Rue wasn’t a fan of the girl. 

I mean Jules practically ditched Rue for this new girl halfway into the night and Rue just looked like she wanted to run her over with a truck and rescue Jules from whatever “imminent threat” Rue claimed she was under. 

Yep, Rue was having a manic episode the second she saw Jules walk in with the frisky Afro and as always, Lexi was her number one go-to when she was obsessing about Jules. 

Rue would come running back to her whenever she needed detective Howard’s judgement. 

It did sting Lexi a little to help her crush work through her obsession with her own crush. But if Rue needed Lexi, Lexi would never, and could never turn her down because Rue's happiness was her happiness. 

But strangely enough, that night, Rue wasn’t up to playing detective with Lexi. 

She was almost fed up with having to chase after Jules constantly and by the time Lexi came back with snacks for the both of them, Rue was gone. 

And of course, poor little Lexi had been yet again abandoned by her one and only true love, Rue Bennett. 

So the broken girl decided it was finally time for her to relieve all that built-up pain with something, anything to numb the deteriorating heartache that would seemingly never end because who was she kidding, Rue Bennet was never going to choose her. 

Lexi made her way towards Maddy and Cassie who were just about to mix some Gatorade and Everclear into two cups - Maddy's very own “let’s-end-up-in-a-coma” drink, at least that’s what Lexi felt like was happening to her after chugging down an alarming amount (for our amateur Lexi, of course) at the night of the winter formal. 

As Maddy spotted Lexi approaching the countertop, she grabbed an additional cup and nonchalantly chucked in disproportionate amounts of Everclear and Gatorade, which Lexi would usually ask 100+ questions about, making sure the exact contents and alcohol percentage and the right consumption level for whatever time it was she was drinking at to prevent any unnecessary acid formation (Lexi tends to freak out about these things).

But instead, that night, Lexi was just in total pining mode and as Maddy flung her wrist stretching the cup towards her, shouting in that sassy bad bitch tone “LeT looSe bITch”, Lexi snatched it with her right hand and downed it all in under nearly 5 seconds. 

Cassie just stared wide-eyed at her sister’s new-found “don’t give a fuck” attitude and Maddy began yelling, “YEss bitChHh, here’s another one for ya alcohol prude-ass.” 

And that’s when things seemed to get a little fuzzy for the short girl. 

The most she can remember is helping herself to a few more drinks and then ending up splayed across Maddy's bed with Cassie below on the inflatable bed and Kat from across her on the floor with a pillow and blanket. 

However, there is a fragment of one of her living remnants of that night vividly plastered within the back of her mind - the one that gives her mental convulsions just contemplating the probable outcome of this so-called "catastrophe" of an event that would have transpired. 

But Lexi hasn’t been more grateful to God for not letting it happen. 

In fact, from time to time, she still gave her thanks in her occasional prayers (mostly when she saw her roommate turning the gas on again and hoping for her not to blow up their dorm along with the rest of the college building). 

As she was sprawled across Maddy's bed with Cassie attempting to pull her dangling legs up onto the bed whilst hearing the tipsy girl’s slurred murmurs which made out a “ ca-cAss, wh-ERe is my phone”. 

Cassie rolled her eyes and reached out to get Lexi's phone from under one of her lazy legs which were currently crushing the tiny thing.

“ank yOu, sis,” Lexi indistinctly mumbled, grasping the phone with unsteady hands and dropping it beside her pillow as Cassie tucked her into bed whilst Lexi squirmed about with the side of her face digging into her pillow, her mouth open, as the light from her phone screen reflected sharply back into her eyes which made her squint into the screen, trying to adjust to the level of brightness.

"MOVE BITCH," Maddy groaned as she hopped into bed beside her, forcefully shoving lexis nonreactive legs onto her side of the mattress.

“What is up with u today?”

“Wha- what,” Lexi replied, twisting her neck slightly up to face Maddy who was lying on her back, staring straight up at the ceiling with no expression.

“Bitch, you were on the verge of passing out and landing face-first into my fucking pool.”

“I was?” Lexi asked in an almost unfazed tone as she turned over onto her other side, facing away from Maddy with her phone now resting against her right arm as she used her other to unlock the thing.

Even though she still felt numbness from all the toxins she dumped into her system by suppressing her ability to think straight, it wasn’t the kind that would set her free from the spiralling feelings of sheer misery and desperation, soaring at 100mph across the millions of fast-paced neurones in her brain that had ultimately been provoked by Rue fucking Bennett. 

Lexi just wanted to feel liberated for once. Speak her mind. Tell Rue Bennett that she would fucking take a bullet for her any day. Tell her that she loves her more than anything in the world. Tell her that she hasn’t dated and hasn’t been willing to date anyone because she can’t stop imagining the breathtaking vision of her crush. Tell her that the occasional heat between her thighs could only be released thinking about Rue pressed up against her, holding her hips in a firm grip as she madly bites and sucks at Lexi's tender neck all over. 

And that’s exactly what she did that night. 

Or at least she thought she did.

Lexi opened up her chat with rue and began typing away. Spilling out every little detail she wanted to, everything she needed in order to clear her conscience and feel better. 

However, during her frenzied state, never did it once cross her mind the awkward consequences she would eventually have to face after impulse texting Rue. Maybe because an alcohol-induced Lexi was heavily influenced by the heart containing irrepressible feelings and totally oblivious to the meaning of rationality. 

So she proceeded to her Rue Bennett mission without a second thought. 

She was so invested that she didn’t even realise Maddy was still talking to her (she just sounded like a blur of resonance to Lexi's ears at this point), about how Lexi almost fell unconscious into her pool and was the “life of the party” for creating such a scene when she refused to go inside at Cassie’s request which eventually resulted in Cassie dragging a whining Lexi amongst a crowd of mocking, no-life teenagers filming the whole incident.

_**Hey rue-rue** _   
_**There’s something I’ve been meaning to tell u for some time now.** _   
_**You know...** _   
_**I think about u all the time.** _   
_**In the morning as soon as I wake up, during every class, at dinner and even in the fucking shower. But most importantly, I dream about u.** _   
_**At night.** _

Okay, this is not where Lexi thought she was gonna go when she said she wanted to speak her mind. 

But for some very inconvenient reason, Lexi had no filter whatsoever and at that moment, her fingers were working at the pace of a sewing machine, operating faster than her brain could even process what in the heck kind of a sinful act she was in the middle of committing. 

A crime she would regret for the rest of her life when she woke the fuck up from whatever otherworldly fantasy she was immersed in.

_**About u doing things to me.** _   
_**Things that get me so hot and bothered even through the subconscious state of dreaming.** _   
_**Things like pinning me up against a wall, hoarsely whispering all kinds of obscenities in my ear like “you taste so fucking good lex” while licking and biting my earlobe after each low moan u forcefully coerce out of my mouth.** _

Lexi was a fucking mess. Was she really about to let Rue know she wants to fuck her before telling her she's in love with the damn girl?!?! But of course, the rocky girl was completely out of it, battling to force her dreary eyelids open- the high was beginning to have a drowsy effect on her now.

_**Tightening your grip on my waist, jerking me closer,** _   
_**staring deep into my eyes before** _   
_**licking ur lips and diving straight** _   
_**into my mouth. Hands naturally** _   
_**sliding down under my pants,** _   
_**pulling at my ass.** _

Lexi's fingers began to work up and down at a much slower rate now, breathing softly, at an evened out rhythm. 

_**Each tug making me groan into ur mouth** _   
_**as u bite my bottom lip** _   
_**so fucking hard** _

_**soothing it with insanely erotic licks** _

_**Grabbing the back of my thighs** _

_**lifting me up against the wall** _

  
_**Digging ur fingernails deeper** _

_**and deeper** _

  
_**into my thighs** _

_**as u squeeze** _

  
_**harder** _

_**guiding me** _

  
_**into** _

_**grinding** _

  
_**against...** _

_**___** _

“LEX? LEXI WAKE UP,” bellowed Cassie from across the room.

A startled Lexi jolted awake from her deep slumber as she groaned from the struggle of trying to open her heavily weary eyes but quickly gave up and instead snuggled adorably into the pillow, trying to gain comfort. 

She realised that her head was throbbing when she tilted it slightly against her pillow which made her wonder why it felt like she had been hit over the head with an iron club. 

She began to timeline the events of her hazy night. And her version wasn’t exactly the most accurate. 

**Lexi’s inner voice:**

**Okay, so I had a few drinks, somehow ended up on Maddy’s bed and then... oh yh, thought about Rue for the rest of the night** (as per usual) **. Sounded like a pretty normal night so far** (minus the being drunk AF part which Lexi obviously had no recollection of). **And then... I thought some more about rue... and some more. Opened my phone, texted rue about my-**

“OH FUCKKKK.”

Terror struck her like a needle to her fucking eye as she shot up, desperately scavenging the bed for her phone. 

Her heart was pounding like a million rocks plummeting from the sky as the final segment of her night suddenly became crystal clear to the formerly clueless girl and began replaying in her mind like a police siren as she refused to fucking believe the irreversible circumstance she was now in. 

She literally drunk texted her crush about a sex dream in which her childhood best friend was legit about to fuck her. 

What the actual fuck was wrong with her?!

Lexi could feel a panic attack coming as she frantically seized her phone to check whether rue had opened the messages or not. Tears began swelling up within the corner of her eyes as she opened the chat with a knowing look of what to expect. To find Rue's confused and fucking embarrassment-inducing reply. 

This couldn’t be happening she thought. 

She really fucked up this time. 

But as she gazed down at the screen, Lexi found nothing. 

Not a single word from Rue. 

But that wasn’t the fortunate part. 

She couldn’t find any of the words ( fuck words, the fucking dissertation of a text) she had blindly sent the girl. 

There was nothing. Absolutely fucking nothing.

And that’s when she realised, 

SHE NEVER PRESSED THE FUCKING SEND BUTTON.

Lexi couldn’t and still to this day can’t believe the godsent miracle she was blessed with that day. 

She had never felt more fucking lucky in her life.

She intensely let out a long, deep breath as her back slung onto the bed, allowing herself to loosen up from her previously stiffened limbs as she cooled down from her snowballing state of distress.

“You okay there lex?” Cassie asked with a confused look as she had just returned from her trip downstairs to check on Maddy who was, unfortunately, making everyone breakfast (Maddy + cooking = bonfire night for everyone within a 50-metre radius from her) and she returned to find Lexi's dumbfounded expression, giving the exact sigh she used to make whenever she thankfully didn't get picked on in class as she was too busy staring at rue, having slumped back into the bed with her mouth still open in shock.

“I think I am, now,” Lexi robotically replied with a slight voice crack, not evening turning to look at a concerned Cassie standing at the doorway,

“Lex, what happened?” asked Cassie with a look of disbelief. 

“Huh, It’s- um- nothing,” Lexi quickly snapped out of her numbing aftershock and gave Cassie a reassuring smile.

“Are you sure cos you look like you just saw a ghost,”

“No, trust me, I’m fine Cass. Just have this really shitty headache.”

Cassie gave her a soft smile.

“Wow, isn’t this like your first hangover since winter formal?”

Cassie chuckled teasingly leaning against the door.

“Yh, I guess,” replied Lexi rolling her eyes at her sister's obvious mockery, bringing herself to sit up against the backboard. 

“Well then, lemme make you a herbal tea before Maddy burns the house down.”

“Thanks, Cass.”

She gave her sister a soft smile before leading her way downstairs suddenly shouting, “GOD MADDY, WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SMELL?!”

_**___** _

As Lexi looked back at those eventful two days in her comfy old bed, she giggled as she thought to herself,

"God, I really did fucking miss this town."

**Author's Note:**

> Credits to everyone who managed to get to the end of this mess😂  
> But really, thank you❤️
> 
> Let me know what you think of it :)


End file.
